


Five Times Sho Refused to Learn How to Cook + One Time He Did

by Jaricchi (Temper_Tantrum)



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Comedy, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-01
Updated: 2015-11-01
Packaged: 2018-04-29 08:40:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5121953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Temper_Tantrum/pseuds/Jaricchi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There were 5 incidents that Sho’s inability to cook led to trouble and yet he refused to learn how, and the one time that Ohno finally led him to learn. Prompt from <a class="i-ljuser-profile" href="http://aishizuki.livejournal.com/profile"><img class="i-ljuser-userhead"/></a><a class="i-ljuser-username" href="http://aishizuki.livejournal.com/">aishizuki</a> ♥ Beta also done by her. :></p>
            </blockquote>





	Five Times Sho Refused to Learn How to Cook + One Time He Did

**Author's Note:**

> This is the FIRST among THREE of the prompts that [](http://aishizuki.livejournal.com/profile)[aishizuki](http://aishizuki.livejournal.com/) challenged me to write ~~_because I ran out of things to write_~~. Hope you guys enjoy! (This is the first time I wrote a drabble-ish fic btw, just so you know).

**TITLE:** Five Times Sho Refused to Learn How to Cook + One Time He Did  
**AUTHOR:** [](http://jaricchi.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://jaricchi.livejournal.com/)**jaricchi**  
**PAIRING:** Ohno Satoshi x Sakurai Sho (Yama)  
**RATING:** PG-13 (because Nino has a potty mouth)  
**WORD COUNT:** 3400+ words  
**GENRE:** General/Humor  
**TYPE:** One-Shot  


~~~~[](http://aishizuki.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://aishizuki.livejournal.com/)**aishizuki** says: Formatting is weird but I tried to fix it k  
  
  
**Five Times Sho Refused to Learn How to Cook and The One Time He Did**  
**= ONE =**

Arashi was still young and they were still so innocent. It was one of those moments where Sho brought with him a home-made bento wrapped in a red hanky with cute little strawberries. Upon remembering that there was free lunch, he abandoned his own bento (placing it at the side) and focused on the given instead. He calmly took his place between Aiba and Jun and began to eat.  
  
"Sho-chan" Aiba called out from his left. "Hai?" he replied, not taking his eyes from his food. "Is that your bento?" Aiba asked, curiously peering at the small box. Sho shrugged, as if to say yeah-I-guess. Jun looked at his once "idol" turned friend with slight caution and amusement. "You brought a bento when you knew you were going to get one?"  
He shrugged yet again. Nino looked up from his game and pointed his chopsticks at Jun which earned hima frown and disapproving look from Sho. "J, Sho-kun has an enormous appetite. That no man can compete against. That!" he pointed at the bento, "is his **EXTRA** ~" Jun nodded, rolling his eyes soon after. "I see..." Noting Sho's increasing annoyance, and slowly inched away subtly.  
"Nino, don't point with your chopsticks!" he warned. Nino stuck his tongue out at him. "And **TWO** \-- Oh-chan has a **LARGER** appetite than me!" he hissed. Ohno, upon hearing his name, looked up with a tempura sticking out of his mouth. "Hmmm?" he asked, frowning at their amused (and in Jun's case, disgusted) faces. "What?!" he demanded. All four simply shook their heads. Nino patted his shoulder in a reassuring manner (unfortunately, it was Nino, therefore the action was Less than reassuring)."Nandemonai. Go back to eating." Ohno spared them all a weak glare before he resumed. Sho raised a fashioned eyebrows at Nino's direction accompanied with a _smug_ smile to which Nino responed with rolling his eyes.  
  
Aiba bounced in his seat and tugged Sho's shirt. "Ne, Sho-chan, Sho-chan!" he called. Sho turned to him, an eyebrow raised. "Hai, Aiba-kun?" he asked. "Can I try it?" he asked, accompanied with doeful eyes. "Try what exactly?" Sho questioned, wary at that expression. Jun looked amused and deemed the situation not worth his time and went back to eating. "Your bento~" Aiba whined, "I wanna try it!" Sho nodded slowly and shrugged. "Sure, why not. Go ahead, I don't mind."  
  
Aiba squeeled and took the said bento and frowned at the simplicity of it. "Onigiri?!" he exclaimed. Sho looked sheepish. "My mom wasn't home right now and the cook was absent today. I had to make them myself."  
Everyone turned to him in awe. "Sugoi~"  
  
MatsuJun turned to him with a pleased eyed. "That's great, Sho-chan!" Sho nodded, a small blush adorning his cheeks. "Domo~"  
  
Aiba turned to the onigiri with a new found determination. "Onigiri-chan-"  
  
" **ONIGIRI-CHAN?!** " Nino blurted out.  
  
"-made personally by Sho-chan with his **LOVE** -"  
  
"OI!" Sho exclaimed, embarrassed.  
  
"-I shall now proceed to eat you with utmost **JOY**!" he finished without beating a beat despite his friend's protests. " **ITADAKIMASU~** "  
  
Everyone held their breaths when Aiba took his first bite.  
  
"...Aiba-san?" Nino called out, worried when he froze. "Masaki?" Sho repeated, slowly extending his hand to the boy's shoulder. "Are you okay?"  
  
Aiba swallowed and put down the rest of the onigiri. "H-hai..." he replied weakly. "You sure?" Ohno asked, in a rare moment of actually participating in a conversation.  
"Y-yeah. Completely--..." he stopped. "Aiba-kun?"Jun called out, in another rare moment of concern. He turned to an equally frightened Sho (which wasn't so rare, because Sho was always scared of something).  
  
"Sho-kun!" he cried out. Sho turned to him startled, his eyes wider than it usually was. "H-hai?!"  
  
"What the hell did you do, Sakurai!" Nino yelled, bringing the attention of the staff around them. "I don't know!" Sho replied, his voice rising in hysterics.  
  
An A.D. approached them in concern (or in exasperation, they tended to do silly things that needed an adults touch from time to time). "What's wrong guys?" she asked. 'This time...' she didn't add.  
  
"Sho's trying to **MURDER** Masaki!" Nino cried out. Sho let out a very Sho-sound and looked ready to break down any second. "I **AM** not!" he yelled back. Nino stood up from his chair and hissed, "Then what the FUCK is wrong with Aiba?!" Sho shook his head in confusion. "I don't KNOW!" Nino was about to do something very Nino-ish but Jun beat him to it and **WHACKED** him on the head with a--IS THAT HIS SHOE?!  
  
Jun growled at Nino (for some reason, he felt like this was going to happen a lot more in the future). "Calm the FUCK DOWN!" Nino backed away; both in pain and fear (ah, the beginnings of the Diva). Jun turned to the A.D. and rose a (still bushy) eyebrow at her, as if to say You're-a-Grown-up-Do-Something. The A.D. coughed slightly and turned to Aiba in concern (because Nino always exaggerates, but Jun was in it too, so it couldn't be fake). "Aiba-kun? What's wrong?"  
  
Aiba just shook his head. "I'm okay. It's just a little tummy ache." he told her. The A.D. frowned. "Tummy ache? What did you eat today?" Aiba shrugged. "Just the usual and Sho's onigiri..."  
  
Usually she wouldn't be concerned with Sho's bento, but something odd was going on so she turned to Sho with a frown. She examined the onigiri Aiba ate and exclaimed. "Sakurai-kun! This salmon is raw!" She cried.  
  
"Eh?" He looked at her weirdly. "Isn't it supposed to be raw?" The A.D. groaned. "Onigiri is not sushi, Sakurai-kun..." With a sigh, she helped Aiba up and turned to Sho once more. "Sho-kun, I suggest you learn how to cook before attempting this again, okay?" Without waiting for an answer, she left with Aiba.  
  
Sho only frowned at their retreating backs.

  
  
**= TWO =**   


"Welcome to this week's episode of Mimi de Nana no Corner~" Mimi introduced brightly. "Yes~ Today's guest is **VERY** eye-catching and popular~" Nana squeeled. Mimi nodded and turned to Nana with a smile. "I know right~" Nana sighed whistfully. "Really eye-catching~" Mimi laughed at turned back to the cameras. "Today's guest will be joining Nana and I in our very **SPECIAL EPISODE**!" Nana nodded enthusiastically and continued for her.

"Today's episode will include a special portion where we will be teaching all you watching about how to make **HEALTHY** yet **_YUM-YUM_** snacks that are easy  
to make~"  
  
"Without further ado, let's all welcome today's SPECIAL EYE-CATCHING guest!" Mimi called out and raised an arm in the guest's corner. The curtain was raised and Sho smiled. He waves to the crowd (and by default to the cameras) as we walks towards the two. The crowd goes wild.  
  
"Today's very special guest is no other than Sakurai Sho-kun from Arashi!" Mimi introduced enthusiastically. "Sho-kun, thank you so much for coming despite your busy schedule." Nana said as Sho came to stand beside them. Sho shook his and chuckled slightly. "No, it was no problem at all. Thank you for inviting me~" he told them politely. They laughed. Mimi slapped him lightly on his arm. "Mou~ there's no need to be polite!" She told him and he gave her a sheepish expression.  
  
Nana and Mimi simultaneously gestured to the chair behind him. "Douzo~♥" They said and he grinned at them and motioned for them do the same. "Douzo~" They laughed once more  
and took their seats together.  
  
"So, Sho-kun, I know this has been asked thousand of times before" Mimi began, "But how does it feel to belong to Arashi?" Sho laughed. "Right now?" The girls giggled. "Yes. Right now." Mimi answered, amused by his antics. "Well, it's pretty great actually, but sometimes--" he paused as used air-quotes, "It can get pretty annoying, but only sometimes." Nana looked curious and leaned closer. "How so?" He shrugged and twirled his hand a little. "Well, there are times I just want to sleep on my day off but then Nino and Aiba pop in and literally drag me off the bed to go shopping.  
Then sometimes Jun calls me in the middle of the night to ask me if his **Purple** Fedora matches his **Periwinkle** Designer Shoes, and there are times Riida arrives in my house before me and proceeds to eat your dinner."  
  
The girls (and by default the audience) burst out laughing. "Are you serious, Sho-kun?!" Mimi asked in between giggles. Sho shrugged and snorted in response. "Sugoi ne, Mimi?" Nana commented and Mimi nodded. Sho chuckled at them. "But I honestly can't imagine my life without them." he tells them.  
  
Nana went "Awww~♥" and Mimi pretended to gag. "Oh my God! Sho-kun, that's so SAP!" She said and he laughed. "I suppose so..."  
  
"By the way, Sho-kun, you know what we're going to do today right?" Mimi asked, trying to get them back on track. "We're supposed to cook right?" Sho answered, a little unsure. Mimi nodded. "That's right!" Nana stood up and pointed to one corner of the studio. "Today we've made room for this special project, this way, Sho-kun~" Sho stood up enthusiastically. "Hai!" Once stationed, Sho turned to the hosts with a small smile. "So what are we making today?"  
  
"We're going to be making simple jelly." Nana told him. Sho made an Oh~ face and leaned in closer, completely enraptured. "Oooh~ but isn't that just instant ready-to-make jelly?" he asked, pointing to the box. Mimi tsk-ed him. "It's not just ANY ready-to-make jelly, its 100% **ORAGANIC** jelly." Sho frowned. "What has that got to do with being healthy?" But he was ignored.  
  
"We'll be adding real fruit bits in it as well." Nana added, showing off an apple, orange and pineapple to the cameras. Mimi nodded. "We'll chop it into small pieces, so that it won't get in the way of the jelly."  
  
"Won't adding fruit bits defeat the purpose of the jelly?" he pointed out. The girls looked at each other before turning to the camera. "So we'll begin this delicious yet **ABSOLUTELY** healthy snack!" they chorused. Sho faulted and reached out to them. "Oie! Listen to me!" he called out. Mimi handed him an apple and a knife. "Sho-kun, kindly peel this~" Sho nodded, a little intimidated. "H-hai."  
  
The camera turned back to the girls as they began to explain on how to prepare the jelly when they heard a yelp from Sho's corner. They all turned and saw Sho clutching a bleeding finger. The girls were worried, until they saw the state of Sho's apple. They couldn't help but burst out laughing. "Sho-kun, Mimi said to **PEEL** the apple, not carve it!" Nana reminded him. Sho pouted at them. "It is peeled!" Nana nodded patiently. "Because you **CARVED** it." Sho pouted even harder. "I did not!"  
  
"Yes. Yes, you did." they deadpanned and he backed down with a frown.  
  
"Just start cutting it Sho-kun" Mimi instructed and they went back to explaining which way was the best to prepare the jelly. A couple of instructions passed, a rather large chunk of apple flew in one of their bowls of jelly. The camera (and the girls) were quick to turn back to Sho-who was struggling to remove the knife from the chopping board. They all gaped. "What the hell?!" they chorused. Sho looked at them sheepishly. "I...uhm...used to much strength and it, sort of, stuck?" Mimi nodded. "We can see that." He pulled and grunted. "Just wait--I nearly have it--" he gave a startled shriek (that was amusing, in another time) as the embedded knife was removed.  
  
The knife went flying and Sho went falling.  
  
The girls rushed to his corner and peered at his fallen form. "You okay, Sho-kun?" He groaned and gave them a thumbs up. Mimi glanced at Nana and glanced at the Director and winced. "Ano...Sho-kun, why don't you sit this one out..." She told him and he grinned at her. "Okay..." Needless to say, he was banned from helping and ended up showing back on set to eat.  
  
Nana approached him while they were all leaving. "Sho-kun..." she called out. He looked up and smiled at her. "Hai?" She looked at him seriously. "Sho-kun should **REALLY**  
learn how to cook." With that, he was left alone. "Huh?!"  
  


**= THREE =**  


He didn't mean to burn down the set! He honestly didn't mean to! How was he to know that in order to get warm wipped cream, one does **NOT** stuff the whipped cream can in the microwave!  
  
He also did not know that it would **EXPLODE** and cause a **HUGE FIRE** which would cause **Electricity Shortage**. He also did not anticipate that the fire would get so out-of-control that it would spread on to the set. He also did not realize that the spreading fire would eat up everything on set and got so BIG that the Fire Department had to be called. He honestly didn't!  
  
He knew everything was insured (he made sure of it in the beginning) and even if it wasn't, he was definitely going to pay for everything--but that's beside the point!  
The point was that it was his fault (not saying it isn't at all!) but it was just that he didn't expect " **THAT** " to happen at all! He expected that reaction from a spray paint not a--oh.  
  
**Crap.**  
  
He was so **STUPID**. Keio Graduate his ass, damn he was so stupid!  
  
The Director took one look on his sullen and extremely guilty expression and sighed. He patted Sho's slopping shoulders. "We can't have this happening again, Sho-kun." He told him. Sho nodded back sullenly. "No more cooking experiments, okay?" The Director warned. Sho frowned. "I wasn't trying to cook. I can't cook." The director frowned in surprise.  
"Well, best start learning now. This probably would've never happened if you knew." He then left.  
  
Sho frowned at the director's retreating figure. "What does learning how to cook solve this?!"  
  
  
**= FOUR =**  


A family night was a night everyone went home and had home cooked meals. Unfortunately, his mom wasn't home yet and his brother was with her. His sister went to the the Ladies Room and his dad had to answer a VERY important call from work. Which left him the most important task of **FLIPPING** the meat at the PERFECT moment, but as he was waiting for that moment, he wondered slightly if adding wasabi would add a bite in its flavor.  
  
So he did just that, he added a large chunk of it on the meat and added the approppriate sauce and flipped it. Then he wondered if it was too much of a bite for Shu, and so he added Sugar to the sizzling meat, but then it would have been too sweet for Mai.  
So he grabbed the salt and pepper and gently sprinkled it over the meat. That was the moment his mother arrived. She breathed a sigh of relief to see what he was doing and sent him out. A few minutes later, they all sat down to eat.  
  
"Ittadakimasu~" they chorused and took a bite.  
  
And choked.  
  
"NANI KORE?!"  
  
"Kaa-san, I'm DYING!"  
  
"Anata, what did you add to the meat?!"  
  
"Me?! I left Sho in...charge..."  
  
Four heads turned to the eldest son who was trying not to barf. "Sho..." they all groaned. "H-hai?" he replied, eyes tearing up. "Please learn." his mother pleaded at him.  
  
Sho could only wince.  
  
\---  
  
**= FIVE =**  
  
Sho was having an absolute great time. If--and **ONLY** \--if someone would sit with him. What was point of renting the **ENTIRE** restuarant if he was eating alone anyway?! He pouted and pointedly ignored Nino's jabs. He flipped the vegetables and sprinkle a random sauce all over it. He took a bite into one of the meat and winced. Too salty. He grabbed his coke and drank it all, the saltiness did not go away. _Definitely too salty..._  
  
A sudden figure sat across him, looking up, he managed not to choke on his meal to greet the man. "Johnny-san!" he cried. The man chuckled and grabbed a vegetable. "Need some company?" the man asked, Sho grinned. "Please!" he replied. They talked and had fun. Half an hour passed and Johnny stood up to leave. Sho frowned. "Leaving already, Johnny-san?" The older man grinned at him and winced as he rubbed his stomach. "My stomach's acting up again. I'll be back." Sho nodded and his gaze followed Johnny's retreating back before returning to his meal with a small frown.  
  
**_Johnny-san never did come back._**  
  
A few days later, everyone in that party was called. Apparently, Johnny-san was taken to the hospital for mild food poisoning (non-life threatening, a few antibiotics and he'll be fine). Upon police investigation, the restuarant kept using old meat without checking if it was expired or not and was **QUICKLY** shut down. For some reason, Sho ( _and by default **Arashi**_ ) knew it was more likely his fault than the restaurant. (Even if he didn't know why.)  
  
When he went to work that Monday, Jun looked at him coolly and opened his mouth. Sho beat him to it. "Learn to cook, right?" he said. Startled, Jun blinked and nodded. Sho sighed in exasperation and left the room.  
  
  
  
**= _One Time He Did_ =**  


Ohno Satoshi rummaged through Sho-chan's refrigerator and raised an eyebrow at a container with a **sign** that said " **FAIL** ". Curious, he removed it and assessed it. He took a careful sniff and frowned. It didn't smell sour, so it wasn't expired. There were fork marks, so it must mean Sho ate some and kept some for later. So why was it marked **FAIL**?  
  
Taking a fork, he sat on the kitchen counter and took a bite. The moment the unknown substance touched his taste buds, he understood why.  
  
"Mazui..." he groaned as soon as he was able to swallow. He winced as he still could taste it. He didn't even know what it was made from. This horribly pathetic disgusting substance could only made one thing-- ** _Sho made it_**. So the **Fail** note was because he really did **Fail**. **OTL**  
  
He frowned as he contemplated. Sho didn't throw it away which only mean that he was going to eat it. He didn't bring it to work with him because he didn't another repeat of the " **Aiba Incident** ". He frowned even more when he imagined Sho eating this at home all the time that he must have gained some sort of immunity to his own food. Satoshi frowned. That was hardly fair...  
  
Without a second thought, he brought down his fork and ate some more.

\---

Sho arrived home to the sound of some one throwing up in his kitchen. Worried, he quickly rushed it and saw his Satoshi throwing up in his sink. He ran to him and rubbed the man's back. "Satoshi!" he cried, "What's wrong? Are you sick?" He glanced around to see what caused this. It could be a new epedemic! Instead of some mutant roach or zombie (he was definitely hanging out too much with Nino), he saw the container and his eyes widened. It was worse than he thought!!!  
  
He turned back to Satoshi and quickly asked, "Why did you eat that?!" Satoshi didn't answer until he was sure he would puke on Sho. He looked up into Sho's panicked eyes.  
"Because you do." Sho frowned at him. "Of course I do, I did cook these monstrousities. It would be a waste." Satoshi nodded in understanding. "I know and you're immune to it." he added. Sho raised a brow at him. "Yeah...I suppose, I got used to it in the end." Again, Satoshi nodded. "Exactly. I'm trying to build mine as well."  
  
"Whatever for?!" Sho asked, incredibly worried was he. Satoshi huffed at him. "I want to." Sho looked at him as if he grew a third head (or he turned into a Nino). "What?!"  
Satoshi laughed slightly. "I want to be here for you too, Sho-chan, even if it means eating your cooking."  
  
"Why?" Sho croaked.  
  
Satoshi smiled slightly and took Sho's face in his hands. "Didn't I tell you before--lean on me, the way I lean on you?" Sho's breath hitched as he tried to blink away his tears. "Baka~" he managed and Satoshi laughed. "Won't you tell me?" he asked. Ohno tilted his head in confusion and blinked. "Tell you what?"  
  
"To **LEARN** how to cook."  
  
Satoshi's face softened into a smile as he shook his head. He caressed Sho's face softly. "No." Sho looked at him intensely, not satisfied. "You don't need to know how to cook for me to eat them." And Sho smiled.  
  
Finding, for the first time, his reason to learn.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> Feel free to go through my [**MASTERLIST**](http://jaricchi.livejournal.com/4014.html) for more! :D


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